I have had to work at creating a healthy marriage.
One of the most important keys was surrounding myself with "men of excellence and wisdom".
I have been in accountability groups or mastermind groups searching for the truth. Along with that I make myself vulnerable and totally transparent before them.
I have discovered that men will only share to the depth with you that you are willing to go with them.
Here are two things I learned about myself in these mastermind groups:
- Facades were never of interest to me; if I didn't get the truth the first time I knew I was bound to repeat the class.
- I have always had the attitude of just tell me the facts and then I know where to go or how to fix it.
During our marriage there would always be a new challenge.
Hey, I had never been married before and I was not ashamed to admit that I didn’t always have the right answers. When you have 8 to 12 trusted advisors at your constant disposal it was pretty sweet to ask for help.
It seemed natural to ask the guys who cared about me tough questions about my career or family.
This was not just a one-way street either; these guys had the same consideration from me. We are not experts in all fields, but we have gifts in certain areas that allow us to offer help when needed. I would often go to my mastermind group with marriage or family questions.
I can’t tell you the times that I would throw out to the group my plan of attack only to have someone reel me in and salvaged at the last second.
When someone else has lived your experience, his input is invaluable.
If I had not had these guys I can only imagine where my life could have ended up.
There would even be times that Robin and I would connect one on one with other couples in the group. We would discuss best practices related to the children or our marriage, our goal was to have a healthy marriage.
Investing time with other men builds trust and allows for healthy and confidential dialogue.
I remember one decision facing us that required the counsel of many of these guys. We had to choose between reinventing my business or selling.
There were so many thought-provoking questions that surfaced during these discussions. We felt we had received wonderful and thoughtful advice. We were able to choose with confidence rather than out of emotion.
My guys have been the best source of encouragement and prompting me to go further in my marriage and business.
If you want to strengthen your business or foster a healthy marriage it's time to surround yourself with the right kind of men.
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