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Do you ever get the feeling that you're just not yourself? Maybe the situations you encounter lead you to feel out of place. Or maybe it’s the people you surround yourself with. Let’s face it, the world nowadays seems to reward squeezing yourself into any role, as long as you fit in.
But that’s not what life’s about! We’re all made with unique characteristics and perspectives. Why do we neglect our values, for the sake of being liked?
It Runs Deep
As much as I’d like to think we’ve moved beyond this, the truth is our subconscious mind still directs much of our thoughts and actions. A long time ago, if you didn’t fit in with the tribe, you got left out in the cold … sometimes, literally.
This need for acceptance by our peers is ancient. It’s not surprising that we prioritize it, but that doesn’t make it right. In a time where you get to decide who you want to be, why strive to do the bare minimum? Are you afraid of what others will think?
Do you think it’s impossible to find anybody different from your current crowd? Do you believe you’re the only person in the world who feels the way you do? Do you believe there’s more to life, and it’s worth seeking?
Well, if that last set of questions describes you, I’ve got some great news!
A Better Tribe
We need to push through our instinctive urge, and find new and better “tribes.”
That’s why I love online masterminds so much. They’re a surefire way to level up your thinking and integrity. “Online” means you can be wherever you are and still have access to people who care deeply about you and your success.
Of course, the people in these masterminds want you to like them and vice versa, but that’s not the main reason to participate. People join high level masterminds because they know something’s missing. Something they’re unlikely to find on their own.
Maybe … no, scratch that. This is DEFINITELY a good time for you to join a mastermind group..
For men, click here to join one of our Monday groups. For women, click here to be part of one of our newest groups, launching September 28th.
Strength in Numbers
If this past year taught me anything, it’s that nobody does well alone. Think about it ... 2020 has been one of the craziest years on record! Those who’ve faced isolation and tried to deal with everything on their own have had a rough turn in the saddle.
It’s inspiring to see several members of our mastermind groups having their best year ever. They’re actually growing through the chaos!
Finding the True “Right Fit”
Do you want to know why these people thrive, despite everything that’s going on in the world? It’s because they put three core values at the center of everything they do, especially their interactions with each other.
Authenticity
Authenticity means being genuine at all times. This is the most important quality of the three, because authentic people stay true to their values. The values themselves may develop and mature as the person grows, but they stick with them, as though they’re “factory-installed.”
It’s hard to change things that matter to you. If you try, other authentic people will have the courage to call you out. There’s no hiding things in these groups!
Doesn’t that sound like something we all should strive for? Life and business sure would be simpler if we knew others’ intentions at all times. The great thing about masterminds is there’s a vetting process that weeds out people who struggle to be authentic.
Our groups are invitation-only, through an interview process that helps discern a lot of character before someone joins a group. Would you say you’re likely to be invited, or pass the interview? If so, keep up the good work, and consider joining us in Iron Sharpens Iron.
For men, click here to join one of our Monday groups. For women, click here to be part of one of our newest groups, launching September 28th.
Vulnerability
Some people struggle with being vulnerable. I blame social pressure to “be tough.” Toughness is good, but some make the mistake of “shelling up,” like a turtle. They hide their thoughts and intentions, afraid of what might happen if they poke their head out.
While suppressing feelings and “powering through” may seem like the way forward, they’re actually counterproductive, for two reasons.
First of all, a healthy regulation of emotions is vital to happiness, and that includes emotions where you “let your heart speak.” It doesn’t mean you’re right or wrong; it means you take the risk of exposing destructive thoughts and limiting beliefs, so you can overcome them.
Second, acting “tough, no matter what” shows people you lack the ability to make deep, personal connections. If you have your “bulletproof vest” on all the time, people will begin to look at you as more of a machine than a human being.
Try a softer approach, and show others they can trust you. You’ll be amazed at what it does!
Transparency
Transparency means it’s easy for others to see how you operate. It’s a bit like authenticity, but it focuses on your actions more than intentions. To be transparent and honest takes a deeper level of self-awareness and accountability. People tend to struggle with transparency because they have the wrong motives.
Motives are reasons people have for doing the things they do. Somebody might say they’re doing something to help others, but then turn around and expect a reward. To act servant-hearted, and then flip the script goes against the very definition of transparency.
Start with good intentions, but work hard to let your actions match your intentions. A little more transparency will do you a world of good!
Surround yourself with people who exhibit the qualities of transparency, authenticity and vulnerability, so you can sharpen them in your own life.
We have some openings for groups of people just like that, and I can’t think of a more important time in my life to make this change than right now.
For men, click here to join one of our Monday groups. For women, click here to be part of one of our newest groups, launching September 28th. |
